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2.03.2012

Have a good weekend!!!





What if being in love didn’t mean losing apart of you, but gaining something new? Maybe this thought is somewhat romanticized, but many of us can be afraid of this word, and this deep feeling. I am definitely one of those people. I have seen the hate, destruction, and subserviently that has derived from a decaying relationship. Maybe love isn’t what is ultimately feared, but the emotional letdowns that inevitability comes along with it.

Isn’t it human instinct to avoid pain? Well that’s what I had been doing for the past three years. Avoiding the pain that comes along with love. I’m cautious, realistic, and I hate to say it but even a little afraid of this four letter word.

I told myself over and over to live life not waiting or wishing for someone but to let that someone find me. This person would prove his self to me, to show me that I’m worth it, and to show me the meaning of this ultimate feeling.
Well when this person and I crossed paths, I still held back my feelings. I didn’t want to lose my independence, my outgoingness, or my social life. I believe the key to life is to live for YOU and no one else. To do what makes YOU happy, and make decisions based on what YOU want and no one else. Life is too short to hold back or miss out. But if one can find a partner to allow them to be all they can be and share these experiences in life with them then that is key; support.
Maybe some of us have had negative experiences with relationships, but no one should ever lose himself or herself in a relationship, or who they are. One should hold on to who they are and keep learning and loving more and more about what kind of person they are. One should never enter a relationship if they haven’t established the person they are, and have begun to expand on that, and live life on their terms. That established person should forever stay with them, and grow, learn, and learn to love. They should be overflowing with self-worth, confidence and love, because in a relationship one has two people that love them; his or herself and their significant other. If one has already begun to learn who they are and how amazing they are, and knows never to let anyone, even themselves take away that feeling from them, then in my mind, they can survive the roughest, and hardest obstacles love takes them on.

Think of yourself as a glass of water, filled to the brim with happiness. When you add another person to this glass they just cause it to overflow. So if this person ever leaves, you are still left with a full glass. You shouldn’t rely on anyone to make you happy but yourself; your significant other should just be a bonus.
That’s where subservience comes into play. If we rely on someone, anyone in our lives in order to be happy, feel fulfilled, or worthy, then we are overlooking and putting a band-aid on a missing piece of our self, instead of completing ourselves on our own.
It may seem my outlook on love is negative, but this isn’t the case. I could be naïve and romantic and throw my emotions out there and put myself in a venerable position. But relationships from my past have helped form my outlooks, and strong domineer.
Whatever the case, love is beautiful; it should be a shared and meaningful experience that only brings more positivity into ones life. Not anxiety, jealousy, or competition. If we could live content being who we are individually, then maybe we could live contently with that one person who has confessed their love for us. Untilthen, eyes will wonder, and boredom is a familiar feeling that can take over at any time.


Anonymous

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